I know you’re asking yourself if I’ve completely lost my mind, but hang in there with me for a minute. American Greetings is “updating” some of our favorite characters from our youth like: Care Bears (with “less belly fat” and have longer eyelashes - who wants an anorexic teddy bear?) and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (will be more muscular and less agitated). And, as you can see above, Strawberry Shortcake. The new and improved Strawberry Shortcake is less pudgy, due to a “fruit forward diet” (those are the words from American Greetings, not me). Oh, and she’s given up her sweet calico kitty for a cell phone. A friggin’ cell phone? Why not have her give up the kitty for an iPhone or Blackberry. The only thing missing on her is a C-cup.
Well, at least if PETA decides to give Ms. Shortcake a shot at being their newest spokesperson, they probably won’t have to worry much about any scandals.
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